disconcerted, disconnected

today was woozy. as if the gods in heaven had a drink all night, slept the whole day and forgot to set the stars right. until later.
i woke up early. around eight in the morning. i was excited. i had a great day ahead of me.
i thought it would be a bright day. it was sunny when i rose from bed.
i wanted to wear white jeans, the one i have not worn for several months now because of the rains. a long-sleeve shirt in baby pink would be perfect with it.


after i laid down the jeans and shirt on the bed, it rained. there was even a thunder. as if a storm was coming. frustrated,  i returned the pants inside the cabinet.


instead, i decided to wear an old pair of dark jeans, the one i have been wearing for the last few weeks. unwashed. smelly. i would still wear the pink shirt. who cares?
i went to the press room of a bank nearby to work. it was early. i thought i would have the room all by myself. (actually i was hoping to see cute teevee reporter again. i saw him early this week at the same press room. but i was shy. so i did not get his name.)
i was wrong. a lady reporter form one newspaper was already there. it was alright though. she was busy, so she won't mind if i talk on the phone a lot, doing my interviews.
i took my laptop out from the bag. plug the wire. insert the wireless internet thing.
sadly, the wireless internet won't connect. i tried several times but it just won't. darn!
i packed up my stuff. laptop back inside the bag. rolled the wire. unplug the internet gadget.
the english speaking youngish reporter asked: are you leaving?
i nodded.
"i am going to smaglosun to complain about their very bad internet service."
"will you sue them?"
"i might."
"go!"
i left.
outside, there was still a bit of rain. tolerable. i could walk without getting wet. i mean soaked.
i ignored it and just walked. i had my dark shades even if there was no sun.
again, who cares? i was in a foul mood.
at smaglosun, the queue was long. i was such in a lousy mood, i decided to just leave. i might just blow my top and shout at the poor customer service agent. it would be unfair to her/him. not their fault. i decided to go to an internet shop at the mall. a mere fifteen minute walk. it was still drizzling.
luckily, the internet shop was empty. just me and an old lady skyping with her daughter abroad.
she was several rows away from me. i did not mind even if she was talking loudly, emotionally.
i checked my emails. the replies from sources that i was waiting for arrived. i printed them.
i paid and went to a nearby coffee shop. i tried the wireless internet again, it was still not working.



forget it, i thought. this is not my day.
i had cappuccino. hot. tall. sixteen ounces. i did not put sugar. i was not sweet today. the bitter and hot liquid woke me up. lifted my mood.
i called up another interviewee, a banker whom i have known since adam was in pampers, but he won't reply. i tried again, but this time my phone was wobbly. as if it had not eaten for years.
i checked my load balance. i still have five hundred and six pesos.
this time, i wanted to scream.
but i controlled myself. i did not want to disturb the coffee shop, my favourite hang out. the staff knew me already. they gave me whatever i asked. they don't bother. they don't ask lots of questions.
a few hours later, i tried the internet connection again. i was still disconnected from the other world.
i gave up. decided to watch a movie. nothing interesting.
would it be alright if i simply jump from the third floor?  will i die instantly? or will i still suffer?
i got scared from these thoughts.
a lady friend called. she cheered me up a little bit.
this time, the cellphone worked. she must have super powers.
i tried the internet and it also worked this time.
ah, my guardian angel in disguise.
who would have thought that bitchy friend was my lucky charm.
i emailed again banker friend. then another from a government run pension fund.
after a few hours, i got their answers. the banker friend refused to give out any information, even to answer my questions. but pension fund was great. he replied and even talked a bit.
i left the mall. the rain has stopped. i got my story.
it was a fine day, after all!

(please don't ask me what's the point of this post. wala! pasensya ka binasa-basa mo. wala ka ring magawa ano?! seriously, thank you for sharing my wala lang moment. all pics are taken from the internet, so please don't sue the poor, still jobless me.)



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