valentina's dilemma

at two in the afternoon today, i received a frantic, transatlantic call from vavoushka veroushka, my jet-setting london-based amiga whose flat i am currently squatting. vv just came from a one week vacation in turkey and greece to get a tan (you know how london is. just look at all the ghastly, pale people. chos!). she called to checque how i was doing, was my move smooth, did i encounter problems at the guard, administration, etc.
after i told her everything (including the following), we talked about something very important. read on please.
*i luv your minimalist, zen like apartment. any apartment or flat or house without teevee (flat screen or the old style bulky type that already belongs to the museum of antiquity) is minimalist in my book. having said that, i really luv her flat. very spacious without making you feel empty. what's more, it has the priceless view of the roxas boulevard, allowing me a glimpse of the glorious sunset at dusk. i always make it a point to stay at the terrace at around six, glass of red wine on hand to watch the sunset.

*i had to fly three of my mother's a dozen ladies in waiting to help me clean up the flat. while the flat was clean (somebody cleaned it up before i move), the oc me was not satisfied. so i had to fly the three ladies first class from our hacienda in the south to manille. i had to fetch them pa from the hacienda since the ladies, first time to board a plane, were scared to fly. josh. eh ako rin, even if i have been flying all my life (may lahi kaming aswang), eh takot pa rin sa eroplano. so what we did was to get drunk on the plane (nagbaon kami ng isang galong tuba) to ease our fears. of course, tinatagayan namin ang ibang passengers, including the handsome and pretty stewards and stewardesses. humirit pa nga ang pilot, but i refused. eh kung mabangga kami?!

(so if i have been quiet and absent from manille's upper, hoitee toitee social scene lately, you know where i have been and what i have been doing.)

$$$$$$$

after that, the topic naturally veered towards the valentine's day. here is a secret, the bitchy, jetsetting, designer loving vv is a bit of a romantic. she always drills me about my love life, sex life, the boyz i am currently dating and sleeping with, among others.
i told her that i am choosing among the following as my date on that boring vday. i don't know who invented this thing, but since according to research there are more suicides that take place on that stupid day, i am thinking of having a date just in case. although i am strong enough to fight those dark urges. i mean, if i can handle christmas, new year and my birthday alone, vday pa? double josh. but still, an ounce of prevention is better than....you know the rest.

@@@@@

anyway, i ask her opinion about my possible dates (yes with an "s" snake sisters. please lower those eyebrows. now. na!)

*endo guy. he is handsome in a typical gay filipino definition: lean, mestizo, bit tall, black hair, flirty smile, long, candle shaped fingers. huge shoes. his contract at his current job would end this month. here is vv's take on this guy:

"sister! do  you want to spend the whole night listening to his woes (where to get the next job, how to pay his bills) and calling all your friends who might help him get a job? also, since you are also jobless right now, it might just add up to your...."

"what?" i asked? (to myself: misery, depression, bleakness, darkness, self awareness, solitude..)

"never mind. but it's a recipe for disaster. while i luv the way you described him, i am sure he is a sumptuous american-spanish dish, he is a bomb that is just waiting to explode. two jobless men on a date do not spell romance. that's a recipe for a disaster that could equal or even surpass the horrors of the bombing of pearl harbour! it will be bloody, and i don't mean the naughty, kinky kind in bed."

"so?"

"next!"

%%%%%%%%

*innocent barrio lad who is nineteen. tall, tan and with killer smile. cute. speaks with a provinciano accent (he has been in the city for just two months).

"no!" vv screamed. a deafening one. i missed that. hahahaha. oh vv. come home. soon. let's paint the town bloody red again.

"no in a good or bad way?"

"bad. dump. do you want to spend the night tutoring him on everything? from putting the seatbelt on in your car to using the proper utensils at the restaurant, to riding the lift at your newly found flat, to flushing the loo?"

"but i don't have a car!" i protested.

"that's not the point, dahlin."

"but i like him a lot. i like his naivettee. his boyish looks. and the body. oh my."

"next!"


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*old flame x. dated him a few years ago. met him on facebook and he wanted to see me. tall, lean and mestiso just like endo guy. but he has dimples and he is quite smart.

"hmmm.. promising. but there is no more mystery in him. i know you. you luv the mystery. you luv decoding the codes. while i luv his face (i sent his picture to vv), the night can be boring after the "catching up" conversation. unless you want to go to bed right after dinner?"

"why not?"

"up to you. but i still think he is not the one.'

"i didn't know you have such high standards. for god's sake, vv, this is just a vday date. we are not talking about marriage here, or launching my career as manille's hottest financial journalist again!"

"baby steps dahlin. you've been there before. and look where you are now."

silence. i hate her honesty sometimes. i wanted to scream "cruella de ville!!" at her.

"are you there?" she asked in her typical but acquired british ilonga accent.

"yes."

"next!"

%%%%%%%%

silence again.

"that's it? you only have three choices? is this junessa del vianco vda de dubois we are talking about? what happened to you?"

"i grew up."

her time to be quiet.

"i've actually given up dating. one nigh stands. i spend most of my time now reading books. staring at the sunset. writing on my blog. thinking...."

"thinking?" she interrupted me sweetly, not rudely. "about what? since when did you learn how to do that? aren't you always a slave of your heart? your brain must be rusty now."

"i don't know. a lot. things."

"dahlin, that's depression talking. here is what you should do..."

then she told me.

i hung up. smiling to myself. why didn't i think about that. i have to give it to vv. she is one brilliant lady when it comes to dating and affairs of the heart(less) and the loins. thriple josh.

but i am not going to tell you.
that will be my secret.
to paraphrase victoria court: my lips are sealed!

&&&&&&&&&

there are things that are better left unsaid.

that's all fairies, queens, pa-queens, ladies, pa-ladies, princesses and wannabes. happy vday to all of you! don't let the blues eat you up. just drown your blues on the reds, if you know what i mean.
chos.