the dream hunter

there's something about the quiet, dry evening that woke me up.
when i looked at the clock, it was only three in the morning.
too early to rise from bed, i decided to just lie down.
hoping that soon, sleep will find me.
but a few hours later, it never came.
feeling restless, i decided to turn the dvd player and tv on.
but soon, the movie (realtiy bites) bored me. i have
seen it twice this afternoon..and more than
a hundred times  since i bought the dvd years ago.

for the past several days, i have been waking up early in the morning..
sometime i wake up at around two, sometimes at three, sometimes at four..
there must be something about this bed, i thought, as the movie went on...
as winona ryder, ethan hawke and the rest of their restless generation x searched
for the meaning of life while losing jobs, searching for themselves and breaking hearts..

this morning (or late afternoon when i woke up), i was surprised to find a long lost friend, ok former lover, who suddenly dropped me a message on facebook. it simply said: "hi...merry christmas."

.....and i thought he had forgotten all about me....
and i thought i had forgotten all about him...

the message bothered me the whole day.
should i reply?
ignore?
what will happen if i reply?
will i feel better if i just ignore it? and him?

while trying to decide what to do next, my mind has become preoccupied with memories of him.

ah, how long has it been?

(more later...)